Lucy Tantamount

Lucy Tantamount is the only daughter of Lady Hilda Tantamount and Lord Edward Tantamount. Her husband, who was also her second cousin, died two years ago and she still wears black in mourning. She is of middle height and slim with short dark hair, thin lips, and naturally pale skin. John Bidlake is her "pseudo-uncle" and she is currently having an affair with his son, Walter Bidlake. "She was afraid of loneliness and needed her cavalier servants in constant attendance" (Huxley 90).  Lucy is constantly having an affair with some man and she strings them along until she is done with them. They all seem to be "in love" with her and she finds it pathetic. She thinks Walter acts like a little puppy dog and it kind of disgusts her, but at the same time she doesn't want to lose him because like it says, she is afraid of being alone. At this point in the book I think her personal philosophy is centered around the aesthetics of life. She craves attention from men and entertainment, just like her mother, which leads me to believe she is somewhat of a hedonist.

Free Write (CHRISTMAS)

It's Thanksgiving Break which, to me, is the start of the holiday season. I am a christmas fanatic. It's by far my holiday and I obsess over getting the decorations up and decorating the tree. I love coming home after school to a decorated house and a christmas tree. I love the smell of christmas trees and scented pine cones and I love all the traditions that come along with the holidays i.e. ice skating (even though I actually hate ice skating), making cookies, wrapping presents, making puzzles, etc. I start listening to christmas songs in October and the day after thanksgiving I get out the christmas box. As a little kid it was hard for me to wait for christmas day, because I obviously couldn't wait to get presents, but now that I'm older I enjoy the weeks leading up to christmas far more than I enjoy the day itself. Christmas day is honestly kind of disappointing because it is the end of the holiday season and after I've opened my presents I honestly feel sad every year. Believing in Santa Claus is basically the coolest thing on the planet. I don't understand how it's even possible to get millions of kids to believe in something that doesn't exist for so many years, but the fact that they do is so cool. I wouldn't be able to the sleep the night before christmas because I was so excited that Santa was coming, but now that I know he doesn't exist christmas isn't as fun. I would do anything to be able to believe in Santa again, but alas I know he is not real and I'm stuck waiting for the day that I have kids and can play along in making them believe.

Meursault's Essence

In an existentialist's world, Meursault lives the life of a man stuck in the existence phase. He doesn't appear to have many emotions and lives day to day without acknowledging the future or consequences of his actions. He is very observant of the things around him, but doesn't seem have any real connections with the people in his life e.g. he put his mother in a home and never visits her, he has a girlfriend but doesn't love her. He lives in an endless repeating cycle of work and sleep and observing and doesn't seem to realize that he is in any cycle at all. His cycle is broken when he shoots the Arab though. Meursault is put in prison and this is when I think he really starts to determine his essence. As Meursault sits in prison he begins to reflect on his life, seeing as that is about the only thing he can do to occupy his mind. He begins to put in an effort to help pass the time. I think in order to find your essence you have to be aware of yourself, and I think this is when Meursault becomes aware of his thoughts and actions. Although he is thrown into another cycle (being in prison) he is aware of the cycle and constantly strives to keep himself occupied. He even says that he was kind of happy, which is something he never said before in his regular life. He starts to remember little bits and pieces of his life and these little things begin to encompass his essence.

Whitman

"Breathe the air but leave plenty after me, And am not stuck up, and am in my place […] The palpable is in its place and the impalpable is in its place"

In these lines Whitman is discussing the roles of everything in the universe. Everything, no matter what it is, whether it is tangible or intangible, has a role in life. One of the many roles of humans is to breathe air, it's something we have to do to survive and Whitman is saying that even after we die, oxygen will still exist and now "belong" to other humans to breathe. Earlier in the poem Whitman discusses the diversity of humans, but also how it makes us similar in that way. All of the things that compose us put us into our place in the world. Even if we don't know what it is, everyone and everything is on the Earth for a reason. Humans, dogs, trees, rocks, all have a place and Whitman believes they are always in their place. This is a comforting idea because even if you feel lost, Whitman believes you are always living the life you are supposed to. We live together with all of these things, palpable and impalpable, and they help us and in turn we help them. This allows for a lot of interconnectivity in the universe and reliance on things other than just yourself.   

Reflections

My sister, Josie, has played a significant role in shaping who I am today. She is two years older than I am and goes to the University of Victoria. We have always been very close and she has always been my role model, ever since we were little kids. I used to follow her around everywhere, copy everything she wore, and do everything she did. There's a video of us when we were little and I refused to do something until I saw her doing it, and then of course I HAD to do it. Now that we're older and we've grown up and made friends (that don't consist of each other and our neighbors) we have become very different from each other. Our styles, qualities, and many of our interests are no longer the same. I admire how confident she is, whether or not she knows it. She doesn't care what people think about her and watching her live like this has seriously encouraged me to be more like her. She is very genuine and intelligent and has some of the most interesting facts stored in her brain. She has introduced me to so many of my favorite things, like books, music, movies, etc. She has inspired me to embrace my inner nerd. I know a lot of people look up to their older siblings and I think a lot of us younger folk always worry that maybe our older siblings don't love and admire us the same way that we do of them. Josie constantly reassures me that she loves me, though, by being the best big sister. And although we are very different, one of the things we do have in common is our sense of humor. We have the strangest senses of humor and can laugh for hours about the most ridiculous things. I've always been told to marry someone funny, but also I think you should generally surround yourself with people who make you laugh, which Josie constantly does. I think I am "my true self" (if we even have one of those) when I am around her. Even though we don't live in the same house anymore, or even the same country, I know she will always be my role model and my best friend. :)    

Socratic Seminar Thoughts

I was in the inner circle of the socratic seminar this time around and and we talked about a lot of different topics (a lot of them straying from the book), but there was one thing I mentioned at the end of the seminar that I would have liked to talk deeper about. It was on the subject of the three species of Malacandra and how they all work together,  unlike humans who are constantly battling each other. In my opinion, I think the three species are bound together by Oyarsa. They have a common "God" to look up to and believe in and that makes it easier to coexist. There is proof of Oyarsa's existence. He can be (somewhat) seen and he talks to the species. The species know that if they do anything "bent" then they will be punished by Oyarsa. On Earth however, there are thousands of Gods worshipped. There is not one single religion, which creates a lot of diversity, and also a lot differences that can/are fought over. There is no proof of a God on Earth, so all religions believe their God is the real God. I personally don't believe in any God. I have no proof of the existence of one so I don't want to spend my time worshipping something that might not even be real. However, if I did have proof, like Oyarsa, then I would probably do everything that God asked me to. I think if people had definitive proof of a God that frowned upon fighting and "evil" people would coexist better. If I knew I could be "poofed" out of existence by doing something wrong, then I would never do anything wrong and I think most people would agree with this.

"Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not a truth"...

I disagree with what Aurelius states in this quote. I guess what he is trying to say is that there aren't any facts or truth in the world and that is something I don't believe. I think some people find solace in thinking that we don't have any control in what happens to us and that even though we think we can explain our surroundings, God or whomever/whatever they believe in, has ultimate control and is the only truth regardless of what we see or experience. I, on the other hand, think that is absolutely terrifying. I find comfort in facts because they are the only things I can rely on. I can find no proof that God exists, but I can find proof that Earth is one of eight planets that orbit the sun, for example. This isn't to say that there aren't opinions or perspectives, though. Every person has their own perspective and opinions on what happens in life, but I hope that when I look out my window and see a blue sky, the sky is in fact blue and that is the truth. Some people argue that mental illnesses are examples of how our eyes can sometimes deceive us, so how can we trust our sight? In this case, although sight might not be trustworthy, I trust the science of mental illnesses and complications in our brains to be the reality of the situation. Maybe I should be more open minded though...